realists | open ✧ the time to fight is now

[ Cassian's eyebrows go up because how can he not tease her, just a little, telling him something like that. His own smirk is about on as solid ground as hers but it's there.

Still, he holds her gaze for a moment, considering. ]

We become an intel relay. Here, right here, as long as we're stuck here. This far out, wouldn't even catch the attention of the Empire; besides, they're usually dead drops anyway.

It'll give us something to do, something to focus on.

[ A hand reaches out to smooth some of her hair away from her face. ]

[ it's perfect -- safe, yet useful and it would keep them informed. boring, but boring is probably what's best for them. and jyn would never in a million years have thought of it herself. there was little in the way of intelligence gathering in her guerilla training, at least not hers specifically. ]

You've been planning this already, haven't you?

I want to know when I have to start worrying about my face on holoreports from the Empire. I want to know if they ever find out who you are.

Besides, it's not like we can spar, I've already been told I have to be able to run a lap around the building without getting winded first.

[ This is not just his job; this has been his life for nearly as long as he can remember. Boring, yes, but it'll keep their minds occupied, and that's important. ]

[ not doing anything had weighed on her heavily, the idea that she isn't doing anything for her friends (as if they would be angry with her for living). having a task, no matter how small and possibly inconsequential in the long run, immediately did wonders for her emotional well-being.

enough so to cause her to lean forward and bridge the space between them finally to press a brief, chaste kiss against his lips. ]

I would win even if you weren't hurt, [ she offers casually as she draws back enough to focus on his face, subtle brightening of her eyes the mark that she's teasing. mostly. 51% teasing. ]

There's a good chance of that, [ He says easily but his pupils are a little wider, breath coming a little quicker. It was a nice kiss, unexpected, and he presses his lips together with a smile. ]

But we'll have to wait to find out. Do you want to go inside and eat?

[ those dimples ]

I think... [ she trails off thoughtfully, head tipping to the side. having an objective cleared her mind in a way that is allowing her to actually think without being bogged down by negatives and what ifs. she is far from okay, but it is a step in the right direction. ] I think you should try your exercises in the water.

[ the natural buoyancy and resistance would probably be good for him. that decided (yes, decided), she nods, pushing herself back to her feet and holding out her hands to heave him up with her. ] But I would like to go in, yeah.

[ He takes them, a small, sharp intake of breath when something pulls but that's all; after a moment he's standing and nodding, squeezing her hands before leaning in for his own kiss. Just as fast, just as chaste.

Some things are better to wait for, and patience is a virtue, or so he's been told. ]

I will do that. Try not to eat all the grapes.

[ the rarest thing in the world, when he mentions the grapes her naturally downturned mouth spreads into a wide smile, lighting up her entire expression like a whole new girl. ] Too late! [ the corner of her mouth pulls down in an unmistakable expression of faux apology, before the smile flutters back.

maybe it was the grapes that prompted that smile, they are delicious, but it's probably not. ]

You shouldn't have slept so late and I wouldn't have eaten them all, [ she protests as she helps him back to the chair. this is a lie. were he awake she would have just taken them right off his plate. ]

[ Cassian makes a sound somewhere between a chuckle and a snort, opting to leave the blanket where it is for now. The smile lights up her face like nothing else, and he thinks she can take every grape on the planet if it means she can smile more. ]

Thief. [ No venom to be found. ] I suppose I'll have to suffer through more cantaloup.

I don't know why you're complaining, I cut it into the shape of grapes. [ that's totally the same thing. she is a terrible person. in her defense... she would eat the cantaloupe too. lah'mu was lush and rainy, but they grew vegetables instead of fruit. being on the run for half her life made fruit a luxury she didn't often have the chance to indulge in so she is taking advantage of it now. at the expense of cassian.

whoops. ]

What do you miss from home?

[ Cassian snorts, shaking his head, but then her question catches him sideways and he has to frown at her a little. ]

From home? [ Home was a U-Wing with K-2; to that point, he shook his head a little. ]

Nothing? [ maybe it's the privilege of have two more years with her parents than he had, but she can't believe he misses nothing. it's not like he's from hoth. there is nothing to miss there. her eyebrows knit together for a moment in consternation. maybe she shouldn't press but jyn isn't often in the habit of doing what she should do. ] Nothing at all? Not the sun or a toy or a little friend?

[ He swallows and his expression shutters a little. He'd like nothing more than to withdraw from this conversation completely, now, but he imagines how he'd feel if she did the same and purses his lips, looking towards the horizon. ]

I was born on Fest. Nothing but snow and metal and people and Ewoks as far as the eye could see. It was always cold, the air was often toxic, because they were developing phrik there.

My parents died during the civil war, [ and now his eyes turn back to her ] so. Not really.

[ that was... worse than she was expecting, honestly, but she already knew he was an orphan, she'd only been hoping it had happened later in life. it made sense that the rebellion took in people with nothing else. they had so little to lose. saw had used similiar recruiting techniques. ]

I'm sorry, Cassian.

[ There wasn't a whole hell of a lot of distinction between what drew people to the Rebellion and what drew people to Saw Gerrara, in Cassian's mind, but he wasn't thinking about that. Instead he was touching his lips, looking at her. ]

Thank you.

[ He swallows, suddenly uncertain. ]

What do you miss?

I don't miss snow, [ she murmurs with something like a laugh. ] We weren't on Vallt long enough for me to even remember, thankfully. I don't think I want to remember being born in prison. But I remember Lah'mu and Coruscant. I miss the rains. [ down in africa ] It was always raining on Lah'mu, my mother would chase my father and I through the fields, just coated in mud. My pants were always stained with grass and mud. My father would build me mud statues and hide them in the house to dry... [ she hums a nostalgic sort of noise, expression sad but touched with a soft sort of smile. ]

[ He has to smile, imagining her younger and at least somewhat unaware of the looming threat, surrounded by loving parents, warm laughter. His own parents are a series of snapshots of quickly-fading memory - his mother coughing while she brushed her hair, his father's hands showing him how to thrust a knife if he had to - and his childhood had none of that warm comfort.

War is all he's known, and suddenly Cassian found himself worried that it was all he could ever have, or keep. Instead of letting it overshadow the moment, he reached for her hand again. ]

And what do you want?

Rain. All my memories of my family are in the rain, even Eadu. It's... it's absurd but I keep thinking that maybe if it rains I'll remember something else and I can have my father back.

[ she shakes her head, abruptly deciding that is more than enough weakness for one day. ] Barring that I had a doll I left behind when we ran. I'd quite like that back.

We could always go back and look for it. [ Completely serious, here; she let him in and he appreciates that, more than he knows how to express, so instead he raises her hand to his lips. ]

I'll swim and then we'll divvy up the rest of the food. Sound good?

Thank you, but I'm not putting you in danger for sentimentality. [ if they had even an inkling that she survived, the smart thing to do would be to post sentries at places she might return to and home would be one of them. ]

I can keep you company if you'd like.

Mhm, good point. [ He'll have to have someone else go, maybe. Something to think about. ]

I'd like that, yeah. [ Nodding, and then maneuvering the chair to move at her walking pace towards the the damper sand. ]

[ part of her wonders if he realizes that keeping him company this time is not for his benefit but for her incredibly shallow benefit. she's usually perched in the corner as they push him through physical therapy anyway, but it is breed more out of a more pure and companionable urge -- she doesn't want him to go through this alone. her own injuries were so superficial in comparison, the least she can do is keep him company.

and harass his doctors like an overbearing mother hen. but he doesn't need to know that. ]

Of course.

[ Like he doesn't suspect she'd give them shit? They're authority figures, aren't they?

He doesn't know who benefits more, himself or Jyn, but he knows he's grateful for the company. Even when the exercises feel grueling, even when his bones ache, it's a little easier knowing she's there. That she's stayed.

Cassian does wonder what she thinks, when she sees his various scars, when she watches him struggle to move through the water. His ego fears pity, but his good sense knows better.

Today is no different. The resistance in the water makes even the smallest movement a more intense struggle, and he's exhausted before it's over, but he still refuses the chair for the walk back to where she's waiting. ]

What if I'm too tired to fight with you over fruit?

[ she is an unrelenting force akin to a pageant mother. ]

Well I will happily take all the grapes without protest and I'm sure we can find something else to argue about. [ which she makes sound like an invitation, but if ever they just start blindly agreeing with each other... no, that wouldn't be right. ]

I'm sure no one mind if we took food back to our rooms. We could watch a holofilm. Relax, like I'm told people actually do. [ sounds fake but ok. ]

[ He's glad not to be on the receiving end of that scrutiny.

Cassian does sigh, a little. Of course she'd take them all. ] Five, at least let me have five grapes.

[ He is haggling over grapes, how did this become his life? At the idea of 'relaxing' he sighs. ]

I don't know the last time I watched a holofilm.

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